Fashion Police

Wall of Shame: Mid-season’s Worst Dressed List

Every New Year’s I write a list of all my aspirations to make me a better person for the next twelve months. Infallibly, right on top of eating healthier and watching less television is being less judgmental of people I don’t know. Ironically, that’s the one that is abandoned the earliest. As soon as I see a fashion disaster worn by a proud wearer who just doesn’t have a clue, the inner bitch in me takes it into her own hands to note just how awful the fashion victim looks. So long, bigger and better person.

We’re in June now so it’s pretty safe to say I’ve fallen off the less judgmental wagon. If you care to join me in my bad karma, here are some of the worst dressed of the season so far, where I found them, what my first reactions to them were and what we can all learn from their tragic mistakes.

From top left:

Where: In line for a downtown club
What I thought: Oh, Rock of Love is auditioning here tonight?
Lesson learned: Tight + short + see through = stripper off duty. For a sexy look, go for a cut-off dress like Hide & Seek Little Black Sleeveless Dress or a short but lose shift dress like the Tori Shift Dress from Lulu’s. For a subtly sexy look, opt for an off the shoulder top.

Where: At the mall
What I thought: When did pants and shoes become optional items?
Lesson learned: If you need to pull it down more than once for it to cover your butt, it’s a top, not a dress. As for the bedroom slippers, the Crocs excuse (“But they’re sooo comfortable!”) is not acceptable. Stores like ShoeFest and EasySpirit make shoes that are fashionable, cheap and comfortable.

Where: Uptown
What I thought: It’s Yetti… in booty shorts.
Lesson learned: If it’s hot enough for cutoffs, it’s not cold enough for furry boots, Uggs or any other kind of winter boot variations. Britney does it, you shouldn’t.

Where: Sea Restaurant in Brooklyn
What I thought: Cold on top with a bad case of hot ankles I see.
Lesson learned: For the rolled up look, choose a pair like the Iconic Cuff Jeans or roll up your own pair for no more than a couple of inches. For anything shorter than that, go for a pair of capris.

Where: Sea Restaurant in Brooklyn (there was a loooong wait)
What I thought: Uhm…really?
Lesson learned: Refer to booty shorts Yetti.

Mn Fashion Week’s Best Dressed

Every party has a handful of guests that upon arrival have everyone else wondering “where did she get that?”. They’re the ones that were able to combine the dress code with personality and a style of their own to pull off the perfect look.
At MN Fashion Week, I decided to check out who those ladies that stood out in the crowd of fashionistas were and see what is their secret to achieve their eye-catching style.

From top left:
Who: Ellen Dahl, photographer for The Minneapoline
Caught my eye because: I love a girl that can look feminine in all male-inspired pieces
Her style: Jacket, shorts and shoes: Vintage, shirt: Ebay
Her secret: “I do a lot of shopping on Ebay. It’s my savior!”
She also recommends Yoox.com and Guilt.com for an affordable way to get designer items.

Who: Amanda Peterson
Caught my eye because: Her shoes were unique and nothing but fabulous
Her secret: “I put this together in like an hour last night. These are cheap shoes and I can do that to any shoe,” she said about adding the embelishments to the back of her peep-toes.
To get your own pair of unique shoes, e-mail Amanda at amanda.peterson1@yahoo.com.

Who: Eve Cohen
Caught my eye because: From the headband to the dress and shoes, she was a vision straight out of the 60′s.
Her style: Dress: Amanda Christine
Her secret: “I borrowed this from a friend who’s styling today. It’s also fun to wear something that’s local.”
For more designs from Amanda Christine, click here.

Who: Jessica Jones and Anna, students
Caught my eye because: I wish I was that stylish at 17!
Their style: Jessica-shrug: vintage, shirt: hand me down from sister, belt and jewelry from grandmother. Anna-belt: Heritage, shirt: Target, shoes: DSW
Their secret: “I designed [the skirt] and she sewed it for me,” said Anna about her skirt. As for the fashion designer wannabe, Jessica recommends shopping your grandmother’s closet. “Grandma’s have the best things!”

Who: Angie Hanson
Caught my eye because: I never thought someone could pull off bright shiny leggings
before
Her style: Top: Kerry Riley, pants: American Apparel, chain: Robot Love
Her secret: “Tonight I am inspired by the Ramsey County Jail!”

Who: Sarah Nielson and Ashley Ryan
Caught my eye because: Tulle and leather? Rough and sweet, absolutely adorable!
Their style: Sarah- top: H&M, Jewelry: Erase & Rewind Ashley- leggings: Urban Outfitters, top: H&M, shoes: Aldo, necklaces from Italy.

Too flashy, even for Speidi

The good, the bad, the slutty

Nina Garcia said it best once on Project Runway: “Short, tight and shiny is the easiest way to look cheap.”

Christina Aguilera seems to have gone back to her dirty days with this outfit. What was meant to look sexy looks slutty-and there’s nothing sexy about that.

Good rules to go by when trying to look sexy are: “If it’s short, it shouldn’t be tight. If it’s tight it shouldn’t be short.” And “If showing leg, hide the cleavage. When highlighting your top, go for a longer hem line.”

Part of being sexy is keeping some kind of a mystery. Show off a little skin and leave the rest to the imagination.